First off, here is what the Razzies are and why they are relevant (even though picking the worst movies of the year may seem like a joke). For the full nominations, which will be cut down on Jan. 21, click here
Without further ado, let’s get to the picks…
Worst Picture: The Hottie & The Nottie – The Paris Hilton-starring flick is this year’s juggernaut. Plain and simple: If Hottie doesn’t take at least three Razzies this year, I’ll be shocked.
Worst Actor: Eddie Murphy, Meet Dave – It’s funny. Eddie Murphy’s Norbit won Worst Movie, Worst Actor and Worst Actress last year. And while it is tough to top the stench surrounding Norbit (it cost Murphy an Oscar), Meet Dave was pretty terrible. I say Murphy is the front-runner at this point in the contest.
Worst Actress: Paris Hilton, The Hottie & The Nottie – Everything I’ve read says that Hilton has this award in the bag, and I agree. Bet your life savings on Hilton as 2009 Worst Actress winner.
Worst Screen Couple: Larry the Cable Guy & Jenny McCarthy, Witless Protection – Larry the Cable Guy never fails to impress in the garbage films he makes. I’ll give anyone 1000-1 odds that he wins an Oscar. Any takers? If you give me 10 bucks, you could win 10k. That’s a deal if I’ve ever seen one.
Worst Director: Sylvester Stallone, Rambo - You know what? I actually saw parts of this movie on TV during the holidays, and it was, without question, the stupidist, yet thoroughly entertaining movie I’ve seen. It really was an amazing achievement in film. But after about 10 minutes, I had seen enough of 62-year-old Sly gruesomely killing people. And because of that, I say boo to you, Rock-o.
Worst Prequel, Sequel, Remake or Rip-Off: Star Wars: The Clone Wars – I’ve read all the reviews. Indiana Jones 4 was terrible. So was HSM, Rambo and every other movie on this list. But this award really comes down to two films. Speed Racer and Star Wars: The Clone Wars because of how good their original products were. I loved the Speed Racer cartoons growing up, and even though they’re probably incredibly stupid now – especially with Pixar’s empire continually expanding – I still love the original product. But Star Wars was the film that ushered Hollywood into the blockbuster era. It changed movies forever, and because Clone Wars was so bad and the original product was so good, I have to give this award to George Lucas over the other nominees.
Worst Career Achievement: Sylvester Stallone- It’s got to be Sly, right? The guy made the most recent Rambo 22 years after Rambo III - the previous film in the franchise – came out. He, as we said before, is 62 years old. He ain’t killing people with his bare hands in real life. He may send thousands of soldiers into war, but he won’t machette a guy’s head off eight years away from 70. And for that, and his many other terrible movies, Sylvester Stallone wins Worst Career Achievement. Congratulations.
Opinions, anyone? Be sure to let us know what you think about the worst movies of 2008 and who should win Razzies this year.